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Alright, let's get this straight. A Nairobi County official, Geoffrey Mosiria, allegedly collapses from "shock" after learning he might face jail time for contempt of court? Give me a freakin' break.
The "Shock" Heard 'Round Nairobi
So, this Mosiria guy, Chief Officer for Environment, is supposed to appear in court, right? But oh no, he suddenly develops a "health challenge." Convenient, ain't it? His lawyer claims he was "shocked" upon learning he was convicted. Shocked? Seriously? Like he just found out Santa Claus isn't real? According to Court told Nairobi official Geoffrey Mosiria collapsed, hospitalised on learning he risks jail term for contempt, he was hospitalized after the news.
The lawyer, this Danstan Omari character, even pleaded with the court to let Mosiria off the hook until they can review the orders. He claims Mosiria didn't even know about the case that led to the conviction. Uh-huh. And I'm the Queen of England.
But here's the kicker: the judges declined to set aside the order. Mosiria "remains a convict until further orders of the court on February 2, 2026." Ouch.
I mean, I get it. Nobody wants to go to jail. But collapsing from "shock"? It sounds like something straight out of a bad soap opera. I'm not buying it.
And the timing is just too perfect. Served with a summons, learns he might face jail, BAM! Health crisis. It's almost comical how transparent this is. What, did he think he was going to get away with ignoring a court order?
Parklands Development Debacle
The whole thing stems from a conservatory order issued back in March, barring the Nairobi County Government from approving development applications in Parklands without a proper land use plan. The Parklands Residents Association (PRA) accused county officials of ignoring the order, allowing excavation and tree-cutting to continue. So, Mosiria is now in hot water for allegedly defying this directive.
His lawyers are now claiming forgery, saying the signatures on the petition documents were faked. They even hired a forensic investigator! Okay, maybe that's a legit defense, but it still doesn't explain the supposed "shock collapse." And what does the DCI turning up mean? Is this getting even more complicated?
Speaking of complicated, I just tried to update my freakin' operating system and now my printer won't work. What kind of backwards compatible crap is this?
Art Auction Antics: A Brief Detour
While we're on the subject of Nairobi and questionable behavior, did you see that art auction where some painting by a Tanzanian artist sold for Sh3.5 million? I mean, good for him, but Sh30 million spent on art in one night? Seriously? People have that kind of money to throw around while others are struggling to afford rent? It just feels... wrong. Art lovers spend Sh30m a night at Nairobi auction, according to reports.
I mean, I get that art is subjective and all that, but spending millions on something that's just going to hang on a wall seems like a colossal waste of resources. Especially when you consider the problems Nairobi is facing—infrastructure, poverty, corruption... Offcourse, maybe art is a better investment then anything else, considering the state of things...
Back to our "shocked" official. It's all so predictable. A public official gets caught with his hand in the cookie jar, and suddenly he's got a mysterious illness or a convenient excuse. It's the same old song and dance.
The court has ordered Mosiria to file an affidavit explaining his predicament, and the respondents have 14 days to reply. The case will be mentioned again on February 2, 2026. So, we'll see what happens then. But honestly, I'm not holding my breath.